This is not a fashion critique of the 80s, but the opening chapter of a lifelong obsession.
It all started with a new friend, recently transferred from the U.S., and the thousand pairs of socks she seemed to own. Her thick, pastel-colored socks—pooled gracefully around her ankles, paired with colorful Ellesse or Reebok high-tops—instantly brought to mind a young Madonna strutting down a school hallway. Those socks became my first, utterly specific, and defining fixation.
Until then, I’d never given socks a second thought. But suddenly, they became an object of deep desire. I had to have them. Back then in Korea, this specific design was utterly unavailable, so I implored a relative who was traveling to the U.S. to bring me a pair. I’m quite certain I was the only kid in the country with such a specific obsession.
And here is the strange truth
Perhaps it wasn’t really about the socks themselves. Instead, it was the distance — the idea that they had to cross the Pacific Ocean just to reach me — that made them feel so special, so unreachable. This distance was the true object of my desire, the small, tangible longing that defines so many childhood obsessions.
We All Carry a Little Obsession
That affection for socks never left me. I’ve noticed that childhood obsessions often stay with us well into adulthood. These fixations are usually tied to something small and tangible, often representing a tiny gap or longing from our youth that we still try to fill. It’s a relief that my deepest desire didn’t settle on cars or jewels, but merely on a specific type of cotton. People around me still chase their own tiny fixations: buying boxes of crayons they’ll never use, eating pork cutlets every week, collecting figures or cartoon merch. Beneath those habits, there’s always a tender story of a childhood longing.
So yes, it is a great relief that my deepest desire settled on cotton, not cars or jewels. I fully expect to be an old lady in her eighties, and this persistent, tiny fixation on the perfect pair of socks will still be the most perfectly matched, and joyfully selected, thing in my life.
*slouch socks https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slouch_sock
